I scream

Have you ever tried to make ice cream by shaking some milk and junk in a bag and then putting it in a bigger bag with salt and ice? It's pretty hard. and messy. and cold.

Now add roughly a hundred 6 year olds to the equation.

*pulls hair out*

In math we are studying measuring right now and I thought it would be fun to make ice cream. You know, experiential learning and stuff.

SO we made ice cream. I tried to be clear about my directions but somewhere in there I think all the kids heard me say make sure NOT to close the bags all the way and to let your open bag of salty ice water bow down and kiss the precious carpet.

We started out with an organized, clean event. It churned into a crazy, messy, spillfest.

*pursed lips/eyes closed*

In addition to eating their yummy creations, they also loved spilling in various spots around the classroom. Awesome.

At least it's not my carpet.

Is that blood in there?

Thank you and good night.

The Bachelorette is a weird show.

If you think the Bachelor or the Bachelorette are a little or a lot ridiculous (Here are 30 rando people. Please choose one you want to spend the rest of your life with!), you need to read what Knox McCoy has to say about it...

Here is his recap of the first episode of the Bachelorette...

:)

♫ Do you love me... do you love me? ♫

He is 6. I wasn't sure what to say but the turtle stepped in...

When/If I am a mom...

Things I hope I never do as a mom:

Forever Refer to my child’s age in months (after they are 1 year.)  I cannot tell you how stunned I feel when someone talks about their 30 month old. Really? You can’t just say 2 and a half? Please drop kick the months and warmly embrace the years.

Tell them to say things when they have not learned how to talk yet. Moms, I know it is a kind gesture, but please don’t ask your 3 week old to talk to me. They can’t. you can tell me thank you for the blanket, though.

Forever carry my baby in the infant car seat. I work in our church nursery and there was a mom who would carry in the infant car seat with her little girl inside. When the mom was ready to go, she would take her daughter out, and her daughter would then walk around! If she can walk, please do not carry her around in the car seat.

Try to lose the stubborn baby weight.

Just kidding.

Things I hope to do when I am a mom:

Wear my baby! I L. O. V. E. babywearing and will rock the Moby like it is a part of me for the first few months of my child’s life. When they get bigger I will wear the Ergo as much as I possibly can.

Let my kid eat some weird stuff. My sister rocks at this. Well, my sister and I had tea parties under the kitchen table eating dust, dry bread, and dead flies treats leftover from previous meals. Sick. Blech. But we turned out with great immune systems so I guess it worked.

Dress my baby up in awesome costumes, outfits, and wigs. They are powerless so this is the only time I will have ultimate control of how they look. I will get socked later but I think it is totally worth it.

Talk in a high, silly baby voice. We all do it. It is inevitable. I think babies really like it.

What do you hope to do or not do when you are a mom or a dad? If you are a parent, what things have you done that you thought you would never do?

Obsessed

Hello.

My name is Gabriella and I have an obsession with free things. I frequent the site sweetfreestuff.com and I love it. Please go there to send (good) samples to yourself and (weird samples) to others.

Here is a picture of the mail from one day:

3 samples for myself and a fiber sample for one of my rooomates!

Maybe I will start to only use shampoo from the samples. (I could probably get by...)

Cinco de Mexico

Yesterday our class did a bit of celebrating Cinco de Mayo. I played a few fun songs in Spanish and some of the kids danced in front of the class. Then one boy started booty shaking. "No shaking your bottom!" I ordered.

I had a couple of questions from students in regards to my connections with Mexico. (I am as white as they come.)

"Are you a Mexico person?"

"Do you know how to speak Mexican words?"

I love my job.

Ew.

Today one of my 1st Graders said to me:

"Were you picking your boogers? I saw you."

I didn't really know how to respond.

Oh... the life of a 1st Grade Teacher!

Don't Be That Girl: Facebook Edition

Inspired by Tyler Stanton's Don't Be That Guy posts, I have decided to create my own.

Don't Be That Girl: Facebook Edition

1. The Me Monster
Much like Brian Regan describes people who are usually consumed with themselves, this person will take a situation on facebook and bring it back to themselves. This can also be known as a Penelope (from SNL) who always has to one-up those around her.
Example:
Kate: Last night was so hard. I got only 4 hours of sleep as Jack was up most of the night coughing.
Me Momster: Oh my gosh! Last night was really hard for me! I only got 2 hours of sleep as Annie and Rayden were both up throwing up and having asthma attacks and now they both have pink eye.

2. The Questioner
I don't write facebook statuses, but if I did, I would probably delete these comments. This person loves to ask questions about what is going on. They want to know why, where, when, who, and anything else that is plaguing their mind.
Example: 
Kate: Hello Seattle!
Annoying person: Why are you in Seattle? How long are you here for? Did you know I live here? Do you want to hang out?

3. The Liker
I think this person has a smartphone and is on this thang all day long. Or they are just super positive. Or they just click like without thinking.

Example: 

Kate: Being sick is no fun.

Too much time on her hands: Likes this

Kate: I just got the job!

Too much time on her hands: Likes this

Kate: I will remember you... will you remember me?

Too much time on her hands: Likes this

Kate: Is now single.

Too much time on her hands: Likes this

4. The Grandma

I read somewhere that ladies above the age of 50 spend 47% more hours on facebook as college students do. Their comments are everywhere. They also may want to boast their skillz of motherhood on unsuspecting young mothers.

Example:

Kate: Arg! I am so frustrated. I cannot get the kids to church on time. Another week being 15 min late.

Gram: Hey Sweetie, 

It is hard being late! I always planned with 15-20 minutes to spare when I had your mom. Just get up a little earlier than you think. You can always eat in the car too. Love you darlin! 

Love, Grammie

There are probably more. What facebook girls make you want to pluck out your eyelashes?