Don't Be That Girl: Facebook Edition

Inspired by Tyler Stanton's Don't Be That Guy posts, I have decided to create my own.

Don't Be That Girl: Facebook Edition

1. The Me Monster
Much like Brian Regan describes people who are usually consumed with themselves, this person will take a situation on facebook and bring it back to themselves. This can also be known as a Penelope (from SNL) who always has to one-up those around her.
Kate: Last night was so hard. I got only 4 hours of sleep as Jack was up most of the night coughing.
Me Momster: Oh my gosh! Last night was really hard for me! I only got 2 hours of sleep as Annie and Rayden were both up throwing up and having asthma attacks and now they both have pink eye.

2. The Questioner
I don't write facebook statuses, but if I did, I would probably delete these comments. This person loves to ask questions about what is going on. They want to know why, where, when, who, and anything else that is plaguing their mind.
Kate: Hello Seattle!
Annoying person: Why are you in Seattle? How long are you here for? Did you know I live here? Do you want to hang out?

3. The Liker
I think this person has a smartphone and is on this thang all day long. Or they are just super positive. Or they just click like without thinking.

Kate: Being sick is no fun.
Too much time on her hands: Likes this
Kate: I just got the job!
Too much time on her hands: Likes this
Kate: I will remember you... will you remember me?
Too much time on her hands: Likes this
Kate: Is now single.
Too much time on her hands: Likes this

4. The Grandma
I read somewhere that ladies above the age of 50 spend 47% more hours on facebook as college students do. Their comments are everywhere. They also may want to boast their skillz of motherhood on unsuspecting young mothers.
Kate: Arg! I am so frustrated. I cannot get the kids to church on time. Another week being 15 min late.
Gram: Hey Sweetie, 
It is hard being late! I always planned with 15-20 minutes to spare when I had your mom. Just get up a little earlier than you think. You can always eat in the car too. Love you darlin! 
Love, Grammie

There are probably more. What facebook girls make you want to pluck out your eyelashes?


  1. Lol. I love you.

    P.S. ......"Momster"?

  2. NIIIIIIICE!!! Definitely know a few liketastic peeps. and the questioners.

    there's also the "change their prof pic every time they change their underwear" and the "lol" commenters..
    not to mention the "SOML"ers. oh, did i say anything about the "this should definitely not be on my wall"ers?

  3. Love this! I can relate to these definitely. I can't stand when someone updates where they are every second of the day. "Eating breakfast with my cat, Sammy.", "Just brushed my teeth", "Driving to work.", "Got in a wreck because I was updating my Facebook status while driving.", "Waiting on the tow truck." Or when someone displays all of their emotions or dislike for someone on their status. "I really hate people don't show up for my small group, you know who you are!", "I just got dumped, and no one likes me.", or "I just saw a girl from church being so lukewarm."

    Jer, I had to google SOML..I had neve heard that one before, maybe the people on my facebook aren't as annoying lol.


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